What would people think if I do this? And what will they think if I do it that way?

Do you find yourself thinking twice many a time before doing anything that you are not so confident about? Do you wonder what people would think or say about you and your actions, so much so that you even land up canceling your plans due to the fear of criticism?

This is a fairly common situation almost everyone goes through, especially in communities that are closely knit, and may not be as common in urban settings where sometimes one doesn’t even know who lives right next door.

No, it is not so much a matter of lack of confidence that leads one to consider what others would think about his or her actions before going ahead, as it is a matter of not being independent in thought and action. Of course that does not mean that we should go to the extreme end of being selfish and not considering the feelings of others at all. However, as long as your actions do not harm others in any way, whether to go ahead with it should not be a matter of implicit approval by others.

I recollect a short drama that had been broadcast on state radio when I was of elementary school age, the title of which when translated into English was, “What would people say?”. It highlighted the so many different types of problems that could happen at home and in society when almost every character in the play thinks twice, reiterating the title phrase before deciding on doing anything. It sounded ridiculous, especially at the number of times the phrase was repeated throughout the drama. However, the point was to drive a message to the listeners.

I don’t remember the specifics of the drama now that it has been more than 20 years since then, but from my observations over the years and happenings in my life, I have come to realize many aspects of this message. Things can go so bad when over-consideration of society opinion gets in the way of constructive action.

The point to remember is that asking the question, “what would people say?”, is constructive to the society so long as anything bad that was being planned or attempted is curtailed owing to due consideration being given by the person who is the subject. It has the reverse, negative, effect when someone who could have actually contributed in a good way to the society backs out due to lack of confidence or in an attempt to mitigate any reputation risks that could arise from taking the action.

Ever wondered what would the characteristics of most of our current day politician in comparison to this thought? I would say it is a perfect combination of ignoring one’s conscience, plus paying a deaf ear to the question, “what would people say”.

Actually, in essence, it all boils down to examining your conscience and validating the truthfulness of the action being planned. And if it is all about examining one’s own conscience, then it should be more of a “would this be the right thing to do?” question, rather than a “what would people say?” question. One’s conscience would certainly have embedded within itself what would be improper in a society, so just examining ones conscience would do the job right. And when one just examines ones conscience, and takes action without the fear of criticism or rejection from society for having taken an action that is not in any way harmful to anyone, there would me more people taking action. And this would be accelerated further by the fact that all such actions would be driven by more confidence.

Our society is filled with so many people who want to do so much for the betterment of everyone, but they fall short of action due to this one dreadful question, “what would people say”. How I wish everyone would go by the inner truth as guided by their conscience and take action that would benefit the human race, based on independent constructive thoughts and careful disregard for any non-constructive criticism and obstacles that could arise from the negativity in a society. More and more good leaders would then show up, and the world would then be a better place for all of us.